Page 38, “The Persuasion”
Then came the third morning, daybreak. We’d been talking on and off all that night, dozing for a half hour or so, then starting up the conversation again when one of us shifted position.
“We,” he said a few times running.
“Me,” I’d reply.
Then just as the sun was coming up, we kissed in the way you do when you know you’re not going to stop and then moved very quickly, exploding really, stripping off the other’s clothes, thrashing bodies, and nearly crashing the lamp on the night table to the floor. Ecstasy, I thought, as I tried to crawl inside his skin, then stopped, remembering that this was not the behavior of friends, even good ones, when he quickly withdrew, too quickly, before we were done. He kicked the covers back with his foot, ripped the curtains open, and flopped on top of the blankets.
“What aren’t you telling me?” Tonin arrived in my life searching for what was hidden, beaming light into the darkest crevices. “There’s someone else here.” He sensed another male, sniffed him out.
I said nothing. Still raw.
“I mean it, Mariana. You’ve got to tell me. Or leave.”
My stomach cramped; I thought I was going to be sick.
“I’m not kidding. Leave.”
It felt as if a switch had been flipped. Leave. As if I’d just heard that my mother had died again. How could this be happening? How could I care this much? This soon? At all?
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